my father drove

through two kentucky counties

screaming 

“It’s a girl!”

after twenty years

three wives

and four boys, one of which

he could not claim

just before the depression took hold

and dying by his own hand

became more appealing

than dying slowly

in front of me

“Do you think I want Alicia to see me like this?”

he screamed at her

while the garbage burned…

and she agreed